Ready for this Quarter to end

With so much going on in my life and I am sure we all have so much going on I am super ready for a fresh start next quarter and for this quarter to be over!! It has been a terrible quarter for me performance wise and how I once couldn't wait for basketball season to be here. I literally could not wait for it to end this year. I needed that time to really focus on the quality of my work. Just turning in assignments is not good enough for me. I have to put my all into them or else I might as well fail. I also need space from others as well to ensure I am okay and I am taking care of myself. As much as I love my teammates, their presence at times can be overwhelming and being around so many people gives me anxiety at times and I really sometimes am searching for a peace of mind amongst chaos. I am thankful for everything God showed me this quarter and I am happy for it to be ending soon. I am ready for some time back home around family and time to rest and mentally replenish. I loved taking this class and these blogs have served sort of as a personal journal for me and my thoughts that feel safe and are not social media and super public. I plan on finishing strong this last quarter and hitting the weights, working on my dribbling and outside jumpshot, and rehabbing my ankle and knee so I can transition into a productive summer. I look forward to working and saving money this quarter as well so I can make sure I keep my school payments up to date and I plan on working on a few short films this summer as well!! I love this cold weather and I am not ready for that heat but I am sure ready for school to be over and to have a whole summer to perfect my skills in basketball and get my mind right for senior year.

PUC????

Ever since I came to Puc things have been literally a rollercoaster. It's hard to understand why I continuously go through step after step of life just to be at the next step again. I guess that's what life is right? I have been sitting out for a year and a half and I have been so ready to play and now that the time has come I just feel so tired and burnt out from doing everything it took to get there. I had to take 17 units in the last quartet to be eligible to play basketball this quarter in the middle of the season. For most people it would not be worth it but for me it was because I have been here since last year when we had a whole different coach. Coach Mike Esco is the one who originally called me up here to come to PUC. He was let go last year and I have been having to adjust to the situation as it has played out and it has been up to me on my own to understand the eligibility rules and follow them on my own. The plan and vision he had for me is gone and out the window and with our new coaches we instantly began making changes and I adjusted to it while at the same time trying to get myself together. It is super hard for me to worry about myself when things are not super orderly. I am used to discipline and consistency and I personally do not perform well when things are in shambles. Out of all the schools I have been to, PUC for some reason goes through the most changes from year to year. I would love for things around here to be consistent and I would never blame the staff personally. I feel bad for the staff at times. We are a great school and have so much to offer but sometimes we do not keep things the same.

Why for Wembanya?

I love basketball and the NBA but I do not understand why any fan, player or GM would want or even think about tanking for any player.. Has the overall competitiveness in sports just died down?? How could grown men who get paid millions of dollars not perform at the highest level on purpose in hope of getting a next generation level talent to then try 100 percent at that point? That is super backwards. Victor Wembenyana is 7’2” and has dribbling and shooting skills. I've seen all the videos. I understand the comparisons and acknowledge and embrace his skillset and talent level but he has not played one NBA game and he has had so much influence on the NBA already. I am so happy that Adam Silver put out a notice that there will be fines and penalties to anyone potentially attempting to tank and the league will be on watch. This is what is needed because I already see it in a few teams. Yes it's gonna come down to lottery pick but these teams want their best chance at Wembanyama and there is no doubt about his talent that is not the question but why pay your current players millions to not play them and play other people and hope they fail. This is ridiculous and disrespectful to the game itself; it has nothing to do with Victor as a player, it is more of a front office issue. The guys in the big seats need to stop controlling the game and let players that get drafted end up where they end up. These GMs really feed into these trade rumors and companies too much. You can see it in their lack of effort and intentional poor decision making. I hope the NBA continues to keep a close eye out on these teams' decision making.

The Snow Day

I personally have never experienced snow in California and it was the first time for me in a while since living in Maine and it made me feel super happy and excited. When I woke I thought I was literally dreaming when I walked outside and saw the all white on the ground. I seriously could not believe how many trees had fallen down and I expected to see many more cars damaged then what i saw. We had a snowball fight with the soccer team us being the basketball team which was fun and I would say we lost. Everyone was outside more than usual due to the snow which was nice at one point it was sunny out with snow everywhere. The road was super icy and it was snowing on and off throughout the day. I was not ready for what's next because as the day became evening it began to snow even more making the roads even more icey as it got super cold outside. Me and Trayvon and Lorenzo all walked through the snow to the Chevron Gas station just to look at the roads and there was no way a car could safely operate through the main road of Howell Mountain. I sort of knew what this meant for me it was that we were most likely stuck in Angwin until further notice which for most people is not that bad but for me I was personally so so hungry and the food at the Cafe and Grind has no Meat so I was not feeling optimistic about staying in Angwin. Luckily after another day and a half the roads began to clear of ice and cars began to go up and down the mountain again. I was happy to experience something different and see the snow here in the Napa area. It felt like a mini trip to Tahoe with my classmates!!

Please dont look me in the eyes.

For some reason in my life I have always been misunderstood when it comes to respect. I always feel like I go out of my way to give it but sometimes people tend to not feel the love when it comes from me. Is it my demeanor or maybe is it because I do not look people in the eyes all the time? I personally do not think it is rude and people dont look me in the eyes all the time and I do not take it personally. It is a personality thing, it is not a respect thing. I sometimes feel trapped in my mind in the sense of like the environment I was raised in. I was never really taught to look people in the eyes. I feel like growing up in Stockton people just play by an unestablished set of rules that doesn't really exist and sometimes these rules are made known as unofficial law. It was law for me growing up to not store at people or look them in the eyes too long. That was considered a sign of disrespect or an invitation of confrontation without reason. I have seen countless stare offs turn into confrontation and that confrontation turn into an altercation. So sometimes I have to realize where I'm at. I'm at Pacific Union College in Angwin, California right now I can look a person in the eyes. It is okay. Sometimes we have to allow ourselves to adjust to things being how they are now no matter what we know or what we come from. Sometimes the devil tries to steal our joy by not wanting us to feel the love and comfort that comes with change and myself. I have personally dealt with struggling to allow myself to be happy or let my guard down. But as I pray more and more I feel God often comforting me in times of doubt and self neglect.

Is basketball really everything?

I used to always feel like basketball was sort of my ticket out of the neighborhood when I was younger but as I have gotten older I now understand how important it is to take education more seriously. I love basketball and no personal situation or failure within the game of basketball drew me to this conclusion. I was in Fort Kent, Maine in 2021 playing basketball and going to school there and was very isolated two thousand miles across the country in the cold and I thought being away from everyone and everybody would make me happier. My ticket out right? Really it was great for me personally. It was actually fantastic but something in my spirit did not sit right with me knowing how comfortable I was in an apartment on the east coast while some of my people in Stockton back home don't even have cars or money to eat. It is not a good feeling when you have everything you want and even the game you love is going great for you. That does not mean inside you are happy. You never know. I could be on a losing team right now but being within an arm's reach of the people that need me and being able to be there for them is greater than anything the game of basketball could bring me and I could be happier than I was on a winning team. I like being at PUC and the environment, the people, the nature, and the opportunity to get to know God more is what makes things worth it for me.

Take Health Education with Perrin

I learned so much and it stuck with me 

Last summer I decided to take an online class because I needed to catch up on some credits. The class that I decided to take was Health Education (HLED-166) with Professor Ralph Perrin. I know it sounds like a random class to take over the summer but I thought it would be interesting to take it because it sounded like I could benefit from it. 

At first I was kind of nervous because since it was a summer class it would be more of a fast paced class and I didn’t think I would be able to grasp all the content but I did.  I like Professor Perrin's explanation of this class much better than mine. His explanation of this class is that it “encourages the development of self-awareness and promotes “wellness” as a life-long investment. Advocates protection and effective use of human and ecological resources and acquiring skills for individual responsibility. Emphasis on SDA health principles. Treats substance abuse and nutrition as required for Seventh-day Adventist and California teaching credentials.” (Taken from the Canvas introduction page). 

The assignments were pretty simple and straightforward and I really liked the flexibility of the class and that we got to pick what we wanted to do for the assignments. My first favorite assignments were the daily tasks which were fairly simple. They included making your bed first thing in the morning, giving gratitude to God and drinking a cup of water as soon as you wake up. Although I already make my bed in the morning, I didn't realize how much more fulfilling I would feel so early in the morning by adding the other two tasks. My second favorite assignment was probably when we had to write a mission statement that we were going to follow and which I actually still look back on. The third is probably the weekly chart  and journal we filled out. It kept me on task and held me accountable. 

I enjoyed the other assignments as well, but those three are things I still think about and still implement in my life today. I just like how I can apply what I learned in that class in my life and I never really get that feeling with classes. So I encourage you all to take the class if you need a GE credits and hopefully it is still online. 

Good luck with finals!

STRESSEDDD

 

As the spring break approaches, the feeling of the pressure to get everything done for school before taking a break is beyond overwhelming. With the end of the semester looming, I know that I need to complete all of my assignments, study for exams, and prepare for any upcoming presentations. my days are packed with back-to-back classes, study sessions, and meetings with professors. Spending my evenings in my room, pouring over textbooks and lecture notes, trying to absorb as much information as possible. Despite the long hours and intense workload, im  determined to finish strong and set up for a successful end to the semester. Spring break is just around the corner and a well-deserved break awaits me, but for now, I must remains focused on my studies and to get everything done before the break.

- Jaz

what the *bleep* is the meaning of life

you are the purpose of your own life. 

not to get all deep and serious, but a lot of people spend so much of their lives trying to figure out what the purpose of life is. or, they give up trying to find the purpose and adopt the mentality that "nothing matters because we're just on a floating rock."

as someone who spent way too many years thinking that the purpose of my life was to try and be good enough to get into heaven, i'd like to offer an alternative perspective:

the purpose of life is simply to live. for whatever reason, we are here and we will be here until our time runs out. things matter because we have a conscious. things matter because we are humans with emotions and the ability to feel happy and satisfied or sad and uneasy. 

you don't owe your life to anyone, to anything, or to any philosophy. you don't owe your life to religion, or academics, or to parental desires, or to society's view of success. 

personally, i never want to lose sight of the simplicity of life. it doesn't have to be difficult. 

getting a degree. landing a successful job. having kids, retiring early. dying peacefully. accomplishing a million little things in between. apparently, that's the picture of success that society has pushed since the beginning of time. but i think success is whatever you want it to be. and the purpose of life is whatever resonates with you. 

it doesn't matter who or what is out there, and it doesn't matter what comes next. you are only guaranteed the life that you are living right now, the breath that you are breathing right now. 

so for god's sake!!! make the absolute most of it because why not try to be as happy and content as possible?! trust your gut, trust your intuition, trust your desires (using discretion of course). 

the purpose of life is to live. It's as simple as pie, as clear as day. 

-jenica nieto

blog #something

Picky eater

 I am an extreme picky eater and often I find myself walking out of the caf after looking at the meal of the day. I would check out the menu before walking into the caf, but the second I see "impossible..." something I lose my appetite and don't want to eat what's on the menu. Ignorance is bliss. Sometimes my biggest issue with the meals at the school isn't the flavor, I can fix tat with some salt and pepper if necessary, but the amount of oil used to cook it. It seems like almost every meal has something that has been deep fried, or the pasta served is so greasy it slips everywhere. Yes, the food here is supposed to be healthy and that is the reason why it is vegetarian... but shouldn't they care about the cholesterol levels in my body after having their meals?!!

Maybe I am a little of a heath freak, but don't get me wring, there is a good reason why I care so much about cholesterol. When I was 14 I almost lost my dad due to plaques (fatty deposits on arteries walls) in his arteries. My dad is a heath freak, so way before anyone even thought there would be plaques inside his arteries, you would never find butter or any high cholesterol ingredients in my house's pantry. My parents aren't crunchy, but they also aren't not crunchy, so even though there wasn't butter at my house (we still don't but butter) they never prohibited me from eating high cholesterol foods as long as I had them with moderation and had a normal exercise routine (my parents aren't almond parents I swear, we love eating). having a balanced diet and exercising daily is the reason why my dad didnt have a heart attack even when his heart only received 16% of the blood from his arteries. I ended up spending my 14th birthday next to my dad's bed in the hospital waiting for his open heart surgery. After his surgery we found out that the reason why his arteries clogged was due genetics and it was likely that my brother and I would have the same thing in the future. I was so scared of having an open heart surgery I ended up having a panic attack and decided to be vegetarian, I tried to be vegan but I just cant give up yogurt. (I am no longer vegetarian, I love meat and I just couldn't give up fish, or chicken soup, or empanadas, or salmon, and the vegetarian turkey I tried during thanksgiving was just so disgusting I ended up eating the real turkey. I love tacos too.)

I enjoy greasy meals every once in a while, and no longer panic to the idea of having an open heart surgery, but I am still concerned about how unhealthy some meals at the caf can be, and with so many meals being so oily and greasy I often find myself cooking my own food. ( Btw my dad is completely fine and he makes all kinds of non vegetarian meals, even though he won't eat them, but he is so good at cooking and so good at not drowning my food in oil I just love going back home and eating until I feel I am going to explode)

Anna <3

Mental Health Days are Important too

Mental health is such a taboo topic but it is something that needs to be talked about more often. This is especially true due to the fact that it is something that affects everyone no matter their age, gender, or sexuality. 

Luckily now it's a topic that is being talked about more often but it is still something that a lot of people don't take too seriously. This honestly sucks because mental health not only impacts one mentally, it impacts one physically, socially, and so on.

With all of this said since mental health impacts people in more ways than one, this brings up the topic of why mental health days are equally as important as sick days. A lot of the time students or employees have to lie to their bosses and professors as to why they were not in class or at work.

This is because most of the time people will tell you to brush it off and that mental health is not that serious to point that it won't allow you to come in and do work. When in reality it is, while mental health may not be contagious like the flu is, it still impacts the way one can think, feel, and act. It also helps determine how we handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. Along with this it also hinders one's ability to work as well as others at times. 

To add to this mental health can make someone feel sick even if they are not actually sick. This is especially true since some people lose their appetite, and they also feel increased fatigue throughout the day. All of which make it difficult to come into work and focus. Hence why I believe mental health days are as equally important and as valid of a reason to miss school or work. 

Though to take a successful mental health day here are some tips:

• Plan ahead if you can. 
• Ensuring that you've taken steps to rearrange your workload lessens the stress that one has to deal with after. 
• Decide What You Need Most
• This can range from being alone and spending time on things you enjoy, to spending time with people you care about and have fun with.
• If you need to relax then RELAX.
• This can mean watching your fave shows or:
• Attending a yoga class
• Getting a massage
• Swimming at the gym
• Taking a walk in nature
• What to Avoid:
• Smoke, drink, or use other substances
• Overeat unhealthy foods
• Ruminate or wallow in negative emotions
• Spend all day reading posts on social media
• If you need to make some changes:
• You can start to eliminate stress by:
• Creating a list of things that drain your energy
• Cutting out some of your larger stressors
• Taking a look at your priorities

Thank you and I hope this helps.

chat/rant later x shannea

Study Tips for the Stressed Student

 Finals week is one of the most stressful times in a college student's life. For me at least, no matter how much I've done over the course of the quarter to prepare for this time, I always feel like there's too much to do and too little time to do it. It is with this misery in mind that I am writing this blog. Hopefully, with a few study hacks that I have discovered over my time as a student, you can reduce your stress levels and avoid some of the mistakes I've made. 

First, try creating a study schedule. Planning out specific study times for each day leading up to your exams can help you stay focused and make the most of your time. Be sure to include breaks in your schedule, so you don't get burned out. When you're studying, try to use active study techniques instead of passive ones. Passive studying, such as reading notes or textbooks, can be ineffective. Instead, try explaining concepts to a friend, practicing problems, or creating flashcards. 

Another important study hack is to break up your study sessions. It's better to study in shorter, focused sessions rather than cramming for hours on end. Some of my friends study by breaking their study sessions into 45-minute intervals with a 15-minute break in between. Personally, I like to work on one subject for an hour or so and then take a break and start on  new subject. By cycling through different projects I am able to keep my brain fresh without boring myself or getting too hyperfocused on one subject.

A key tip for me is to avoid distractions, whether they come in the form of rowdy friends or social media. This can be done by finding a quiet place to study alone or giving your phone to a friend while you study. It's really all about what distracts you and what ways you can block out that noise. You can even use an app that blocks distracting websites during your study sessions. 

Additionally, don't sacrifice sleep to study. I've done it a million times so I know the excuses. However, a Red Bull or a coffee from the Grind will never achieve what a good night's sleep will. Sleep is crucial for concentration and memory retention. Aim for at least 7-8 hours of sleep each night. It's also important to take care of yourself both physically and mentally during finals week. Make time for exercise, healthy meals, and stress-relieving activities such as meditation or yoga. 

Finally, don't hesitate to use resources available to you, such as office hours with your professors, tutoring services, or study groups. By following these study hacks, you can make the most of your study time and reduce your stress levels during finals week. Remember to stay focused, take breaks, and take care of yourself. 

You got this!

Marguerite :)

Different approaches to finals

 Finals are approaching fast, and everyone is in a frenzy trying to study. I've noticed there are three different types of students when it comes to finals week, the ideal student, the self-teacher, and the happy go lucky student. Now let me explain what exactly each of these means starting with the ideal student. The Ideal student is the student that paid attention from the beginning till the end if week 10, attended every class, did all the assigned reading and assignments etc. So, for them studying for finals is more of a review because they were actively learning all quarter long, these are also usually the teachers' favorite types of students because they're easy.

 Next, we have the self-taught, and this is the student that didn't really pay much attention in class, skipped every now and then, overall has kind of just made sure they turned assignments in without actually learning anything. Basically, only did the bare minimum to pass while being mentally checked out. So now that finals are approaching, they are in a tricky situation. They have a good grade in their classes, but not good enough to just bomb finals, but they also don't know what to even study because they have been mentally absent majority of the quarter. So now they must try to read, review, and cram new information withing just a week. I happen to fall into this category for a few of my classes and let me just say, it is not fun.

 The last category is the happy go lucky ones. These are the students that somehow managed to get A's in the class weather it was their own knowledge, or they somehow finessed the system. So now when finals come along, they and don't really need to study. They plan to just wing it and hope for the best knowing that they'll still have a good grade even if they bomb it because they're already excelling. These are the students that are least stressed when finals come around, and I'm envious of them. 

With these observations I wish everyone the best of luck studying no matter what type of studying style approach you take, and I'm keeping an eye of if there's another type of studier that I may not have noticed.

-Yours Truly, Jaz

Drifting Apart

For sometime now, my childhood friends and I have been drifting apart and at this point it feels normal. It makes me upset that it feels normal. We went from being together 24/7 to hardly seeing each other. 

Last year the three of us were pretty close, probably the closest we have been since Kindergarten. Maybe it was because it was the first year that we were all together at the same school again and the fact that we had the same classes & schedules. 

Now this year, our schedules are all over the place, one of us is down in SoCal and we only communicate when it's about a common organization that we are in. 

Funnily enough, this isn't the first time we have drifted apart. In some years of grade school we were all at different schools. We didn't see each other that often but we would make time to hang out and even if we didn't make time we would always find our way back to each other. Like nothing ever happened and we picked up where we left off. 

This time it feels different though, maybe because we got into different friend groups and we have different schedules. Maybe it's seeing the post we all share on social media with our newer friends doing fun things that gives us all FOMO (or maybe it's just me). I think for me its just the fact that we don't make time for each other. 

We have all reached out to each other in different forms such as happy birthdays & happy holidays, and even sending random memes to each other. However it never leads to an actual conversation, it just ends with being left on read, delivered or haha thanks.  

I am glad that the three of us are blossoming in new friendships and learning how to be less codependent on each other. But it still kinda sucks to see how we grew apart. There was no event that made us all be mad at eachother, it's just simply that we got too busy with our academic & personal lives. 

I know that we will always be there for each other even if we aren't hanging out with each other all the time or at all. We have been through so many things, that it's impossible to break that bond we have. 

Drifting away from your friends can be normal, it is a part of life and I know we won't stop being friends, it's just maybe we needed a break from each other. Hopefully spring break & summer can bring us back.  

Being an older sibling

 When I meet my current roomate she told me that I have an older-sibling-who-only-has-brothers vibe. I had never been more confused in my life as I was that day. But she was right, I am an older sibling and in fact I have only brothers. I had never stopped to think what qualities an older sibling has. Suddenly I remembered that back in middle school I used to carry in my school backpack bandaids, three different kinds of painkillers, a change of clothes, and shampoo among other things. 

Before you start to think I was crazy or before you call cps on my parents, I think it’s important to make clear I used to travel all the time and I have anxiety. Still, it sounds weird for a 13 year old to carry those things with her all the time huh? But I loved it. I was always expectant of my parents telling me they had packed my bags and we were leaving on a new trip. That’s when the content of my school backpack came in handy. I knew I had everything I needed with me all the time and wouldn’t feel anxious that my parents had forgotten to pack something. 

But how does this relate to my roomate guessing I am an older sibling? Apparently when I Al around I am always helping her fix things, even though she is older than me, I make food for her and have all those things younger siblings would forget to bring with them to college. But I think that me being an older sibling is the reason why we get along, she is the younger of three sisters. I am used to help and she is used to be helped. I am still confused on how she realized I only have brothers, but it was probably in the same way I guessed she only has sisters, gut feeling. 

I asked my friends what an older-sibling-who-only-has-brothers vibe meant. Apparently it means that I am a very chill person… my little brother would love to disagree. Old habits die hard, and even now when I am 9 hours away from my younger brother, I always try help him out with anything I can. Does being an older sibling mean to always live with anxiety? Or is it just me? 

Anna <3

get me out of here!

i am absolutely tired of school. it has been 17 years. 

17 years of homework. 17 years of exams. 17 years of projects. 17 years of showing up to class. 

not to sound cliche, but senioritis is 100% real and i have fallen ill to such a disease. the academic workload feels heavier than ever and i'm holding on to the final shreds of motivation i have left. 

the truth is i have no energy to complete any more assignments, even ones i find somewhat enjoyable. even this blog entry feels like such a heavy weight on my shoulders despite the fact that it is the most enjoyable and leisurely assignment from all of my classes. 

in my entry last week i said that college has the ability to make good habits seem like torture and self-sabotage seem like self-care. nothing has ever felt truer than that statement does right now. 

case in point: writing these blog entries is probably one of the most therapeutic and creatively stimulating things i could do. yet, here i sit on a Wednesday night at 10:00pm, desperately attempting to meet 250 words so that i can finally go to sleep knowing my assignment was completed on time. 

listen, some days it all comes easy and feels enjoyable. other days, i remember i've been doing the same bs for 17 years and i'm sick of it. 

maybe if i was getting paid to do this, i would have more motivation. but PAYING??? LOTS OF MONEY???? GOING INTO DEBT???? All to be sleep deprived and burned out while also being too broke to afford basic necessities and too busy with school to work enough hours?????? what kind of scam is this?!?!?

catch me on another day and perhaps i'll sound more optimistic. but today? today, i'm sick of it. today i have nothing else to say but, "get me out of here!!" 

sincerely, 

jenica nieto

blog #5

A tale of two roommates trying to adult.

 "Adulting" what's that?

It's crazy to think that we are just expected to know how to be adults and to live on our own by a certain age. Though with that said I do think its a good idea that in the four or more years we are in college majority of us get to have a taste of what it's like to be an "adult." Though not everyone knows how to do this in the healthiest or smartest ways. 

To expand what I mean by a taste of "adulting" is simply just having to cook your own food, buy groceries and clean etc... But with that, I have a funny little story of the first time my roommate and I got our own groceries.

So when you are a broke college student you try to mainly buy only the essentials right? well, that's what my roommate and I thought but defining what we need and what we want is quite a difficult task as I've mentioned in a prior blog post. 

When we got to the store we first decided to tackle a few things:

Food: bread, cereal, bagel bites, peanut butter and jam, oat milk (because our body hates regular milk), spam and other processed food, and lots and lots of ramen. 

We then decided to look around more and spotted a couple cute items so we added that to our cart because we felt that our room needed more decorations. Then she spotted our favorite chips, and she also wanted a cheesecake and I wanted macarons that I saw they had in the bakery aisle. After this we just kept adding things to our cart like ice cream, and more ramen and noodles.

After we noticed how much "junk" and unhealthy food we had in our cart we laughed but convinced each other these were all needed and by the time it was time to check out we cried as we swiped our card. 

We got back to the dorm and only then did we realize we forgot to buy water... but pretty much ever since then, we have tried to make a list of things we actually need or are running low on. We found out the reason people have shopping/grocery lists and have truly stuck to that. 

So note to self and to anyone else, lists are really helpful especially if you are trying to stay on top of your things and not spend money on unnecessary items. 

chat/rant later, shannea x

You dont need to have it all figured out at the age of 18

Something that I find mindblowing is the fact that at the young age of 18, many believe or feel that we have to have our whole life figured out... Or at least many as in my friends and those around me. 

This aspect of life surprises me because of the fact that this is not the case everywhere. While there are those who are lucky enough to know what they want to do by that age, there are various who don't. There are even those who think they know what they want to do but change their mind later on.

I specifically fall under that category of one of those people who thought I had my life figured out but as soon as college hit I changed my mind. A lot of people believe I changed my mind because it was hard but honestly I don’t think that's truly the case. This is because while I think I might have known earlier in my life (as in my Junior year in High School) that I did not want to be a nurse, I ignored that feeling because of the fact that prior to the one moment of doubt, I always wanted to be a nurse.

Looking back though I don't know if I wanted to be a nurse just because my mom wanted to be one or because I truly wanted to be one. With that said, after taking a few classes in my freshman year I quickly realized and found myself wanting to write essays over studying for Anatomy and that's ultimately how I decided that nursing was not for me (+ the fact that I don't know how I would feel seeing death and also because even when I wanted to be a nurse, I wanted to be a nurse case manager)

After talking to both of my advisors and temporarily being a double major (Psychology and Communication) during my last quarter of freshman year, and going through so much, I ultimately decided to be a strategical / marketing communication major and so far I have enjoyed it and I find that I am more passionate about my major more.

With all of this said, hopefully, this is the right path for me though I still don't exactly know what job I want to ultimately get but one step at a time. I do want to say that I hope reading this comforts those who are contemplating their major and let them know they aren't alone. Societys expectations for us to know what we want in our life at such a young age is not realistic to everyone. 

chat/rant later, shan x

"Tuition"

 A few years ago there was a decent price in a year of education and even better cost per semester/ quarter but with each day there seems to be a recent push to capitalize on parents, students, and incoming students. It amazes me how the price jumped from 5 grand per semester and maybe 6-7 grand for a private university in the last 10 to 15 years. To me it felt that education used to be a priority with a high promise of making it in a particular field that is your passion and the thought of it subsiding is ridiculous. College is not what I thought it would be and its not even close but learning and bettering myself has kept me going and think outside the box to pass down the knowledge for the younger ones around me and the all the others coming after them. Helping them with how things work for all colleges but personally prefer them to go to public universities because of the cost, atmosphere, and people. 

The Pandemic of Homesickness

I remember when I first went away to college, I felt really homesick for the first month or so. I had a bad experience with my fusion group and back in my room, I quickly realized that my roommate and I were completely incompatible. Not only that but I was in a state across the country from my loved ones, my culture, and my mom's home-cooked meals.

Eventually, it got better. I made new friends, started cooking in my dorm room, and established a routine that made me feel more in control of my life. It took some time, but eventually, I started to feel more at home at college.

If you're feeling homesick, my advice to you would be to take some time to acknowledge your feelings. It's okay to feel sad or lonely when you're in a new place. It's a big adjustment, and it can be insanely overwhelming at times.

One thing that helped me when I was feeling homesick was staying in touch with my family and friends back home. With technology these days, it's easy to stay connected through video chat, social media, or even just a phone call. It was always nice to hear a familiar voice or see a friendly face, even if it was just through a screen.

Another thing that helped me, though I'll admit it was not entirely healthy was throwing myself into my studies and into situations where I could meet new people. It was difficult and at times I felt burnt out and extremely far from my comfort zone. However, these things gave me the distraction that I needed until I was able to find my footing at school.

At the same time though, I think it's worth saying that homesickness is not a problem you have to worry about fixing. It is a normal part of the college experience, and it's something that will likely get better with time. Just be patient with yourself, and try to enjoy your time in school as much as you can.

Homesickness may be tough, but it's just a temporary feeling. Before you know it, you'll start to feel more at home at college and create new memories and experiences to cherish.

Hang in there!

Marguerite :)

Snow the Musical

 The snow was the star of the weekend 

After months of long practices and weeks of set preparations the opening night for Jericho Road was finally here. Everyone involved was both extremely excited and nervous for people to see the musical. As someone who was helping out with the set design & a stagehand I was nervous because I was scared that the other stagehands would forget where the props & set furniture go. 

Throughout Thursday, we (the stagehands) had a couple of hiccups such as, the house walls falling on us when taking them backstage, forgetting to put the laptop on the table for a scene and taking a bit too long to arrange the props for a certain scene. However, it was not as bad as it could have been and the AV team had a couple of more hiccups than we did. 

During intermission (which was way too long) it started snowing… a LOT. People couldn't believe it was actually snowing on campus and those who have experienced the snow were unfazed by the fact that it was snowing. I think the thing is, that people were surprised by how much it was snowing and also the fact that it was sticking. 

Once the musical was finished, it had snowed even more. Some people couldn’t drive back home, so they walked to their homes if it was close enough, others called for their family members to pick them up from campus on their 4x4 trucks and some got stuck on campus so they sought refuge in the guest rooms at the dorms.

The following Friday morning, classes were canceled, the power went out in certain parts of Angwin, roads were closed and sadly the other two dates for the musical got postponed. 

Although most students were happy that they got a snow day, those students & others involved with the musical were not so happy. Some people's families flew in just to see them, but at least they got to see them perform once. Other people's families canceled their flights due to the weather. 

On the brightside, the cast got to perform an acoustic version of the musical on Saturday night, but it was not the same as performing the actual thing. 

Hopefully, some day soon they will be able to perform Jericho Road again on stage in its full glory. 

"lacking Counsel"

Since after graduating from high school there has been constant issues or dilemmas with academic counselors and its astonishing. As my years of college go by and it’s time to graduate and earn a few degrees along the way there has been ongoing failure to communicate with assigned academic counseling. It seems that with these recent years of getting older and old traditions disappear more people in the education profession grown to be lazy or inadequate in their field. It feels that the proper structure of society has gone down or its that time in life where its more acceptable to be selfish then to do right for others even though they are really helping themselves.

When it comes to academics there have been 1 or 2 people along the way that actually cared or will do their job until they find the right place or right thing a student needs to be and have. Personally, me choosing to leave a public college for a private one was the mistake because a lot of issues started and will be finished at a private school. Its wrong that the world is shaping this way because its only going make to make a good amount of people reject school and go into streaming or podcasting and that’s not where are future should be.

Unlocking my inner female

 As a female student athlete, it can be hard to do regular "girl activities" during season. As much as I love playing basketball, I am always excited for when season ends. This is the only time of the year that I can actually do things like get my nails done long, have long hair, wear makeup and just overall feel like a girl again. During season it's impossible to have any of things because it would interfere with the constant game and practices we have. 

With that being said, this era of femininity is always short lived, as we only have 4 weeks of off season before we have to start training again for the next season. But none the less I am taking full advantage of my time off and getting another piercing tomorrow along with getting my lashes done. I also plan on getting my hair done and a pedicure. All this just goes to show that even as a hooper we like to be a little girly sometimes too and this is the only time I can unlock my inner female. So, go big or go home, right?

-Jaz

Having fun

 In January I was able to see Morat live in concert. Morat is a Colombian folk-pop / Latin pop band with an amazing discography, but since is a Latin band they don't usually have concert in the US. IN 2021 they had for the first time a concert in San Francisco to which I wasn't able to attend and it wasn't until 2023 that they would have another concert in San Francisco. 

The second I saw the tour dates I bought two tickets. I didn't know whether I would be free the day of the concert or who I would go with, but no matter what the future had waiting for me, I knew I would see Morat in concert. Exactly a week before the concert I had an allergic reaction to some food I had which made my throat close and made me extremely sick. I was hoping for the allergic reaction to pass by quickly but it didn't, and me being stubborn as per usual didn't go to emergency of health services which only made my recovery slower. I mean it when I say I am stubborn.

Finally the day of the concert came. I had been saving my voice by not talking as much as I usually do just so I could scream as much as I wanted at the concert. I ended up going to the concert with a friend who doesn't listen to Morat or is fluent in Spanish, but Morat didn't disappoint and by the third song he was vibing to the music. The music was amazing and they played some of my favorite songs, but the best part of everything was that we got to be fairly close to the stage and had a good view. I didn't record much of the concert, I was mostly enjoying the music, but in the few videos I took my voice sounds so loud and so out of pitch I just couldn't share any clips of the concert on instagram. 

I'm not sure of when I'll be able to go to another Morat concert so I will cherish the memories I made that day. Plus it was a good break from all the school work I had. Surprisingly enough, even though I screamed like crazy at the concert and my throat had been hurting because of the allergic reaction, I didn't lose my voice. I can’t wait for their next tour in the US. 

Anna<3

third-grade me would be obsessed

you know what has recently been the bane of my existence? acne. 

before anyone gets their panties in a twist saying, "it's not even that bad! you have nothing to complain about! you should see myyy acne..." I know. It's truly relatively mild. 

but that's the thing about insecurity: it doesn't really care if other people have it worse. anyways, we shouldn't be comparing ourselves to others, right? well, the alternative is comparing yourself to your past self - and my past self had glossy, clear skin. my past self got about four pimples a year. 

like many other young adults, my body has gone through many changes over the years. clothes don't fit the same, my hair isn't as thick, and - oh yea - i now have acne.

lately, as i spend time observing my face in the mirror and missing my clear skin, i can't help but remember what my younger self wished for.

as the youngest of six girls, i was always well aware of what maturing women look like and i couldn't wait to be one myself. i remember being in third grade and thinking that older girls with textured skin were so mature and real and lovely. i could not wait for the day that i got acne. 

what can i say, third-grade me knew nothing... 

like, one day my older sister was getting dressed to go to the beach and i was hanging out with her and admiring her as i normally did. she asked me how she looked in her bikini and i said she looked great and that her thighs looked soft and had all these little dents on them. she became so upset with me and i had no idea why!

i later learned that what i was describing to her was cellulite, and apparently, cellulite was not something people desired to have on their thighs. this was news to me. 

you see, i was so enamored by all of these little things that apparently made my older sisters insecure.

i can't help but consider what third-grade me would think of the way i look now.

she would think that my acne was the coolest thing ever. she would be obsessed with the cellulite on my thighs and the stretch marks on my hips. she would think i looked so womanly and mature. 

she didn't know to think of those things as bad because no one had told her yet; she naturally saw them as beautiful. 

just when i think that i'm becoming so much wiser with age, moments like these remind me to hold on to some of the perspectives i had as a little girl. i may have been young and inexperienced, but i was also untainted by the harsh perspectives of society.  

listen: would i prefer glossy, clear skin? duh.

but maybe from time to time, i'll borrow third-grade me's perspective and appreciate my appearance; not in spite of my imperfections, but because of them. 

- jenica nieto

blog #4

“Being a Student Athlete”

 

Life as an athlete was different when it came to university athletics because more eyes was on me and the difficulty had risen with each game but the most problems came from professors. The game came easy to me when playing sports but professors putting major amount of pressure and a target on my back made it difficult to concentrate on the game. To me it seemed that some problems that stim from teachers came from past experiences of athletes that they have taught or perhaps got bullied when they were in school. It never really clicked on the personal vendettas that was against me but with help from counselors I had mellowed certain issues out with professors to help me focus the game plans and scouting reports for future games.

The love of the fans and my passion for the game and my drive to play on a professional level kept my mind straight from the negativity. Seeing students react to my game and reassuring me with confidence on a bad game would be one of the favorite things to be a part of. Also, janitors and other faculty members opening the gym so I could be best that I could be and just be there for me, as if we were like family. Those things will be something I will never forget.

-DeMario Newman

 

“Being Social with Private School Students”

 Going to a private university was very interesting to say the leas because of the different structures and molds they were brought up in are different from people brought up in public universities. The differences can vary depending on the aspect at hand but when it comes to communication it differs entirely from each other. For instance, one is quite and other quite open to express their opinions with no regard. Private schools to me had their benefits when communicating but for the most part I felt that a lot students were more reserved and did not tell me how they truly felt. As for Public schools it is the total opposite where they were more expressive and did not hold anything back even when they are being nice. The difference in communication was the first thing I had seen and won’t forget.

The second difference was the personalities and how a good amount of the had come off in the initial meeting. When thinking about it, it was and still hard to determine how those certain few really are because the personalities of those tend to switch or change after a while. For the most part it wasn’t that bad but when religion or certain politics get involved at a private school it tends to get weird as time goes on. Not everyone who grew up in private schools are unusual but in my experience there is or were a lot.

- DeMario Newman

You Contain Multitudes

 My music taste is confusing. When I tell people I listen to the group 100 Gecs to study or that I nap to obscure anime soundtracks, their reactions range from weirded out to concerned. I listen to country music or alt-rock when i’m happy and rap music or Broadway musical soundtracks when I’m sad. Even though this variety confounds people and makes my Spotify Wrapped almost entirely un-Instagramable, I wouldn’t change my taste in music for anything.

Music is a universal language that has the power to evoke emotions, bring people together, and even shape our identities. While some people enjoy listening to classical music, others prefer rap or heavy metal and others prefer a mix of all genres or a select few. 

Our music tastes are often influenced by our personal experiences, memories, and emotions. For example, someone who grew up listening to country music may have a strong affinity for that genre, while someone who enjoys electronic music may associate it with a certain type of social setting or party experience. For me, some songs from Arctic Monkeys or Halsey take me right back to my middle school days of big t-shirts and bigger emotions.

Our cultural background can also play a significant role in our music tastes. Different cultures have their own unique musical traditions and styles that can influence what we enjoy listening to. For example, someone from Latin America may have a stronger preference for salsa or reggaeton music, while someone from Asia may enjoy J-Pop or K-Pop. However, it is wise not to fall into the trap of thinking that someone from a certain cultural background only likes one kind of music or prefers music from their culture. I have Black friends who hate rap and only listen to K-Pop and Latino friends who prefer Tyler the Creator to Pitbull.

Overall, our music tastes are influenced by a variety of factors, including personal experiences, cultural background, social context, and exposure to new styles of music. The worst thing you can do for yourself is close yourself off to new adventures and genres. I think music is a very important part of life and I think the time to experiment with music is now. There are so many new amazing artists that you would probably love if you took the time to give them a try.

Give it a shot!

Marguerite :)

“Life as A Student Resident Advisor”

 Things can be tricky and unique when being a resident advisor on campus, from the way you get treated by other students and faculty. 

Being an RA is one of the best jobs on campus and has a very open schedule depending on classes and personal time off but could be very demanding at times. The things that would be eye opening in a few ways while being in that position was the reoccurring hours, coworkers not showing up, & other students being made for not accommodating them whenever they wanted. But there was good that came with it and those were being able to use facilities to watch tv or play games, the work pay, connections with the school, and being able to help students whenever they need help or faculty won’t help them. 

Overall it was a fun job but like with any work comes good and bad things that could detour you from wanting to pursue the position.

- DeMario Newman